Living to complete the incomplete

I knew about Dr Lee Wei Ling, the daughter of SM Lee Kuan Yew, mainly through her recent articles in The Strait Times. Maybe because I am now in remission of cancer, I tend to sympathize easily with people who have the similar ailments. I personally know of or have heard of people who are suffering from the same illness as me and they always have my blessings. Somehow, I think that their survival will give me a better chance to live on.

Dr Lee described her surgical mishap in details in an article titled “Live to fight another day”, published on May 17, 2009 in The Strait Times. Her medical problems seem to be much more complicated than mine, although mine is more life threatening. According to her, she had a perforated intestine and there could be potential complications which would eventually lead to her needing a permanent ileostomy. In that sense, I’m luckier. My problem is rather straight forward. Of course again this depends on how you look at it. My cancer could relapse. I might need to go for chemo and I might even die in the next few years.

I once asked my surgeon: “Cancer is a terminal disease. Once it gets to the advanced stage, no modern drug can help. Am I right?” The doctor answered me diplomatically, “Cancer is a life-threatening illness. Early detection will enhance the survival rate.” Patients in the early stages always forget to ask the referenced period of survival – 5 years, 10 years or more. Deep down in my thought, I certainly was hoping for more.

However, especially to cancer patients, life is definitely unpredictable. No doctor has assured me of anything, not even my own oncologist. After seeing so many medical specialists after my surgery on January 8, I came to the conclusion that my illness would only be treated if the doctors were able to identify any symptom. For the time being, I am regarded as a “normal” person. I am not even under any “treatment”. The Tamoxifen that I’m taking now is “optional”. It’s only upon my own insistence that I’m on this drug. As I did not want to take any chances, I've disregarded the possible side effects of the drug.

Personally, I think it is brave for someone like Dr Lee to share the details of her medical problems in public and her thoughts after going through all those difficulties. She said, “no one promised life would be easy and I intend to treat every setback as a challenge.”

But living just to fight another day is no easy task and can be very tiring. I'm taking the more relaxed and philosophical route. My family doctor once advised me: “Now that you’re given a second chance in life, go ahead to do whatever you like.” Yes, I'm now living to complete the incomplete tasks. I'm reviewing my “must-do” list and am secretly adding a little more to it as time passes, hoping that I'll have more to look forward to. Who knows? At the end of the day, I may be able to accomplish more than what I would have had I never contracted this illness.

脚踩万丈雪峰

5月21日，一早醒来便看到蔡冲传来的简讯，说我国的女登山队员于5月20日成功踏岭，脚踩万丈雪峰，站在世界最顶点。

6月2日，又看到蔡冲的简讯，说6名女登山队员们已归国，满脸雪疮未愈，五年的艰辛，当别人都往事业上冲时，她们选择更艰苦的挑战，不计较金钱的回报。

今早（6月4日）海峡时报言论版刊登了一篇“A salute to our Everest heroines”。是的，“女英豪”这三个字，她们受之不愧。

我们无法想象，在攀爬8850米高峰时，她们所承受的精神和体力上压力有多大，那是极限的挑战。背着重重的行囊，在白皑皑的雪山上一步一脚印行走时，天寒地冻，冷霜扑面，冒着生命的危险，靠着仅仅是一个信念令自己坚持到底。

为了准备这次的行程，她们花了5年的时间，有些还是学生时便开始筹划，她们之中最年轻的25岁，最年长的39岁，从招募会员，到筹款，到集训，经过不少挫折，从开始的30人敲定到最后的6人，终于得以在今年3月出发，5月登顶，6月归来。

听说她们集训时，一星期六天，每天数小时，脚绑着2.5公斤、背负着十多公斤的重量，上下30层楼梯。为累积经验，5年来总共攀爬过7个山峰，从纽西兰一直爬到西藏尼泊尔。

为了圆梦，吃尽苦头，牺牲事业以及和家人团聚的时间，秉着信念，朝着一个目标进行，多感人。

每年都有人登上珠穆朗玛峰，在有些国家，攀山不止是一种嗜好，也可以是一种事业，他们装备齐全与技术先进，但新加坡国小民寡，攀山只不过是一种不赚钱且自找苦吃的业余爱好。

所以对她们的成功登顶，更觉得难能可贵。个人认为，这次的壮举，份量绝不比一枚奥运金牌来得轻。新加坡历史浅，我们还在找英雄人物，英雄就在眼前。我们的历史，有她们的痕迹，也应有她们的篇章。

对于勇于追求理想，付出过，努力过，挫败过，得到过而又能放下过的人，我特别敬重。